So Close…

Last Thursday Hubby dropped off copies of our 2013 tax returns and copies of our most recent pay stubs/paychecks. 

Friday I received an email that the doctor’s office had faxed over the letter that the agency needed.

Now I am just waiting to hear that we are approved!

In the mean time, questions to ask your social worker before placement…



Job Interview

One of my other tasks while I was in Raleigh was to meet with my boss and determine my fate in our business. We didn’t get very far, and it wasn’t made very clear to me, but she said there isn’t anything I need to work on. This coming after running her business for two months while she was rehabbing and vacationing (and in the midst of my heart surgery). So I sent her an email later to clarify (when I continued to pry she gave me short answers or changed the subject, and I am not good with confrontation). I asked if she would need my help in the future, even if she did not need me to work on anything now. That was three days ago. I still haven’t heard! It would be very disappointing for me to end my two year position with her not even answering my emails, but who knows!

Once I realized that I wasn’t getting anywhere with my boss and continuing to get hours, I started to look for a new job. I’ve been considering my options anyway, since we moved six months ago and I do marketing. It’s very difficult to work remotely in the marketing field (unless you do social media marketing or search engine optimization)! I haven’t ruled out still working for my boss and having hours in the future, but I need to have something going on in my professional life!

One of the positions I found on in my area (there were not many options) is through AmeriCorps, working to develop and support the CASA program in my county and three of the other surrounding counties. This is a relatively new program in this area and they need help to promote their program in order to gain more funding. In that way they can support  more children in finding permanency. Whomever is placed in the AmeriCorps position will have the chance to work directly for CASA once their year contract is complete with AmeriCorps.

I applied for this AmeriCorps position Wednesday night when we returned from Raleigh. I realized that I was already linked on LinkedIn with the Executive Director so I also emailed her directly. I got an answer that night! She wanted me to come in the very next day! So I went in yesterday for an interview with her, the Executive Director of the regional CASA program, and her marketing director. The interview went very well. They basically need someone who can assist each of the four people in their office. The position will entail some marketing, some case management, some PR, administrative and database tasks. The two women that I met with are obviously very passionate about their jobs and seem to be working hard to bring this program full speed.

With the AmeriCorps VISTA program, you are basically a volunteer for a specified amount of time. You are given a living allowance, health benefits and childcare if you need/qualify. Then at the end of your contract you receive either a monetary bonus or money towards existing/future student loans. I would love to have money to pay off my loans! I don’t qualify for the child care component but the living allowance would more than cover child care expenses.

I got a call this morning from the Executive Director that I got the job! Because it is a full time position, I told her that I had reservations, especially if we get placement. She said that she had already thought that through and has come up with some ideas. So I am going in next Tuesday to discuss how we might be able to make this work!

The position doesn’t start until the end of August. It will be nice when Little One is headed back to school that I will have something to fill my days besides laundry and housework!

Selling Baby Items

One of my tasks while we were in Raleigh was to hold a yard sale and rid my mother’s attic of all the things I’ve been putting in it over the years. Mainly it was baby items. Crib, changing table, travel system with stroller and car seat, bottle warmer, boppy, bumbo, Dr Brown’s bottles, jumperoo (or two), baby toys, baby carrier, breast pump, etc etc etc. But not all the baby clothes, I just could not do it. I would have needed some serious Prozac and Xanax or something to go through all of the baby clothes and decide what to keep and what to sell. Ugh.

I cataloged all of the baby items, put them on Craiglist, wrote up a garage sale ad and posted signs around her neighborhood. I had some interest in the crib and the bottles. No one showed the first day of the garage sale. So I extended it and opened it all back up for a second day. I sold four items for a grand total of $29. The crib didn’t sell. The car seat didn’t sell. Not a darn thing sold. I am guessing that in my mother’s area, most of the new moms get these items at their shower or as gifts (as we did). So I googled local missions and foster agencies and called around to see who could pick up all the items. I had to see who could take all of the items since a lot of the places could not take the car seat or bottles/breast pump because of health reasons.

I live states away from my mother now so there’s no use hanging onto any of the items. It would be cheaper for me to buy new (or preowned rather) than have her ship the items to me. And we’re not going to have another baby! I can’t get pregnant, haven’t been able to get pregnant, and we’re looking for an older sibling group to adopt. Ugh.

So I called Helping Hand Mission in Raleigh, founded in 1972. They sent out a truck with two men the same afternoon. Granted, these nice gentlemen would have rather done anything than to pick up baby items. They complained for a good five minutes that the crib and changing table were not put together. Mind you, my daughter is three so these pieces have been pulled apart for two years and stored in my mother’s attic, but these men acted like I was putting them out for not having them together. They wouldn’t even have fit in the truck if they were all together!! So I duct taped the pieces of each together with the manuals and marched it to their truck for them. I wasn’t letting them leave anything behind. They would not take the hundreds of dollars worth of Dr Brown’s bottles, and probably wouldn’t have taken the breast pump but I didn’t call their attention to it. Besides feeling really poorly about getting rid of all of my daughter’s baby things, these gentlemen did not assuage my thoughts as to making sure these items went to someone that really needed them.

Let’s talk about how sad I was in this space anyway. Here I am, selling all the cute little baby things that only had one baby in them. A precious, amazing gift of one child, but certainly not the intention. Wonderful items that my friends and family purchased for my child(ren) and spent hard won dollars. And I only could manage to use it for one child! So depressing. I couldn’t cry, I was so sad. Is that even possible? I couldn’t muster one tear. I think if I let one tear out, I would have fallen apart. So nothing came. I was just sad and miserable about it. It’s complete. I have managed to sell and donate all of Little One’s baby items. Anyone else have a hard time with this?

Rock Me Mama

Here are some pictures from our recent travels back home to Raleigh, North Carolina. Along with some lyrics of an all-time favorite song…

photo 2 (3) photo 1 (3)

Heading down south to the land of the pines
I’m thumbing my way into North Carolina
Staring up the road and pray to God I see headlights
I made it down the coast in seventeen hours
Picking me a bouquet of dogwood flowers
And I’m a-hopin’ for Raleigh, I can see my baby tonight
photo 4 (1)
photo 3 (2)

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama any way you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south bound train
Hey mama rock me

photo 1 (7) photo 2 (7)

Running from the cold up in New England
I was born to be a fiddler in an old time string band
My baby plays a guitar, I pick a banjo now
Oh, north country winters keep a-getting me down
Lost my money playing poker so I had to leave town
But I ain’t turning back to living that old life no more

photo 5 (4)

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama any way you feel
Hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south bound train
Hey mama rock me

photo 3 (7) photo 4 (5)

Walkin’ to the south out of Roanoke
I caught a trucker out of Philly had a nice long toke
But he’s a-heading west from the Cumberland gap
To Johnson City, Tennessee
I gotta get a move on before the sun
I hear my baby calling my name and I know that she’s the only one
And if I die in Raleigh at least I will die free

photo 5 (10) photo 1 (14)

So rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama any way you feel
Hey mama rock me
Oh, rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south bound train
Hey, hey mama rock me

Oh, so rock me mama like a wagon wheel
Rock me mama any way you feel 
Hey, hey mama rock me
Rock me mama like the wind and the rain
Rock me mama like a south bound train
Hey mama rock me
Rock me

Returning Home

Tomorrow Little One and I leave Raleigh. It is bittersweet! I am glad to get home to my own bed and family, see my husband and get back to our routine. But I don’t want to leave Raleigh! It has been home for ten years and I haven’t been able to really grieve our move six months ago. We got to see my parents, my father in law, a bunch of our friends and my boss. I don’t know when we will be back, but it won’t be until sometime in 2015!! Craziness. 

I missed the heat. I thought that I might be miserable and sweaty but it felt good. I miss the people. I miss the big city, suburban sprawl. I missed the mall and the restaurants. Mainly, I miss our life here before crazy medical problems. 

We return to thunderstorms and humidity. Much like my mood will be tomorrow! 


Adoption Swap Box– Update

Don’t know if any of you signed up for the Adoption Swap held by Tamara over at Adoption Mama Blog, but I got my first partner today! She adopted a sibling pair of brothers out of foster care and lives in my state! I would say that’s a great pairing! I can’t wait to send her a box of fun things. I hope that I can learn from her journey! Who knows what this swap will bring. Then I will get my second partner in July. I am sure it will be just as great of a match as the first!

If you missed the first round, I am sure Tamara will have another. Make sure you message her and let her know!


We Are Not Finished

Got an email from the foster agency yesterday. Remember that last form that had to be signed by the doctor and then we would be approved?

Yeah, now we have 3 more things we have to submit before approval!! It’s not a question of if we will be approved, but when.

Now we have to turn in a copy of our 2013 tax returns and copies of our most recent pay stubs to show that we are still working. Sigh. Wish I had known a week or two ago because I would have been able to do that quickly. We won’t be home until next Wednesday so I won’t be able to submit any of that until late next week. I guess we have to submit our tax returns because my Social Security Statement didn’t have my updated income for 2013 on it when I printed it out for the agency. Not sure why that is a huge deal since I already submitted my 1099 and we definitely qualify on my husband’s generous salary alone. But I will do it!

Since I am an independent contractor I don’t get pay stubs, I just get either direct deposit or a physical check in the mail. The agency said that I can make a copy of the most recent check and that will suffice. 

Sigh. I thought we were ready to be approved!!